Wednesday, December 12, 2018

ICICLES

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If these icy morning photos made you put a sweater on Facebook reminded me today of a much warmer place we were 11 years ago.  Hickiwan Trails in Why Arizona just north of the mighty Ajo mountains.

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WE HAD SO MANY GREAT WALKS HERE YEARS AGO

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GROANER’S CORNER:((  An efficiency expert concluded his lecture with a note of caution. "You don't want to try these techniques at home." "Why not?" asked somebody from the audience. "I watched my wife's routine at breakfast for years," the expert explained. "She made lots of trips between the refrigerator, stove, table and cabinets, often carrying a single item at a time. One day I told her, 'Hon, why don't you try carrying several things at once?'" "Did it save time?" the person in the audience asked. "Actually, yes," replied the expert. "It used to take her 20 minutes to make breakfast. Now I do it in seven."

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Man: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans.  Is it a boy or a girl?Bystander:  It's a girl.  She's my daughter.  Man: Oh, please forgive me, sir I had no idea you were her father.  Bystander: I'm not. I'm her mother.

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Q: Why is Christmas just like a day at the office?

A: You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit

Q: What do you call a bunch of grandmasters of chess bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?

A: Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer!

Q: What do snowmen eat for breakfast?

A: Snowflakes.

What does Santa call reindeer that don't work?

Dinner.

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Tuesday, December 11, 2018

NEW FRONT TIRES, NEW ENGINE BATTERY, AND NEW WINDSHIELD WIPERS ON THE MOTORHOME THIS MORNING

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I WAS THE FIRST ONE AT HURON TIRECRAFT  EARLY THIS MORNING

With an 8 a.m. tire appointment for replacement of the Motorhome’s two front tires at Clinton’s Huron Tirecraft I thought for sure I’d wake up to wind driven snow and salt encrusted roads this morning.  The Gremlins must have slept in because none of that happened and I had an Okay drive there and back.

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NOSING INTO ONE OF THE TIRE BAYS

Having had trouble with the engine battery lately I had that checked and of course was told the rig was in need of a new battery so had that done as well as a new set of windshield wipers which I knew we needed for sure. 

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PROBABLY THE FIRST TIME THE MOTORHOME HAS BEEN ALL THE WAY INSIDE A GARAGE FOR QUITE AWHILE

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OUR NEW BATTERY


DSC00926<<< ONE OF OUR TWO NEW 22.5 MICHELIN TIRES

With breakfast in mind at Kate's Station I headed south out of Clinton on highway four and immediately noticed how much better the rig drove, not that I thought it didn’t drive good before but I did notice right off the bat a pleasant improvement somewhere.  Glad to feel the 40mph ‘shimmy’ was now gone as well.  By the way, my breakfast at Kate’s Station was the best breakfast I have had around these parts for a very long time.  And real potatoes instead of those standard assembly line deep fried generic ‘tater tots’ most places have.

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THE FRONT OF OUR CHEVY 8.1 VORTEC ENGINE

Driving the big rig home this morning I remembered a couple months ago when Mike and Dee dropped by to have a look at our ‘For Sale’ Motorhome.  I posted about that day and mentioned later about the Gremlins at work when I couldn’t open the dash top to show the folks how accessible everything was behind the speedometer cluster, radio, and heater, etc.  Then the engine battery died, had trouble getting the big slide in, some trouble with the side steps, and then of all things the engine light came on when we took it for a drive.  Would you believe that engine light has not ever come on since and had never come on before Dee and Mike had it out for a test drive.  It was as if the Big E was throwing a little tantrum saying, ‘no I don’t wanna get sold I wanna stay with you guys and Pheebs and go back to the deserts and mountains of the Southwest again’.  Well I don’t know………….and I can’t think of any other logical answer.  Can you??

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AT KATE’S STATION WAITING FOR MY 3 EGGS AND 3 MEATS  BREAKFAST

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BAYFIELD RIVER ROAD LEADING TO OUR PARK IS STILL PARTIALLY SNOW COVERED

A phone call late this morning from my good buddy Richard sure lifted my spirits on yet another cold gray day.  In his short sleeve shirt standing in sunshine under a cloudless Georgia sky he phoned just to see how I was doing.  I thought that was very special of him to do that and when I hung up the phone I jumped out of my chair and did a couple of cartwheels across the floor.  Well, let’s just say I did those cartwheels in my mind eh:))

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ALWAYS SEEMS TO BE MORE SNOW RIGHT HERE IN OUR PARK THAN ANYWHWERE ELSE

I think if these gloomy weather days of ours get any darker we are all soon going to have to wear miner's helmets just to see where we're going.  I don't think I can recall so many constantly cloudy days but then again, with the exception of last year at this time, we really haven't been around this area for the past dozen years.  Just another reason, despite all the 'what ifs' to hurry up and get ourselves out of here while we are still physically and mentally able to do so.  It's not just me who finds this miserable weather so damn crushing, it's Kelly as well.  Say you don’t suppose she has been around me too long do ya??

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WITH THE ANGLE I PARK THE RIG AT HOME I HAVE TO COME IN THE STREET BEHIND OUR HOUSE TO SLIDE IT INTO IT’S SPOT

GROANER’S CORNER:(( Things You Should Never Say To A Police Officer::
1. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer

2. Sorry, Officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

3. Aren't you the guy from the Village People?

4. Hey, you must've been doin' about 125 mph to keep up with me! Good job!

5. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical condition to be a police officer.

6. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

7. Bad cop! No doughnut!

8. You're not gonna check the trunk, are you?

9. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.

10. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on the T.V show Cops?

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A fellow charged with robbing a sporting-goods store asked a lawyer to defend him. "I will take your case," the lawyer said, "if you will assure me of two things: that you are innocent, and that you will pay me $1600."The client thought for a moment, then said, "Will you do it for $400 and a nice set of golf clubs?"

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On Christmas morning a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light, and next to him is a kid on his shiny new bike.  The cop says to the kid, "Nice bike you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"   The kid says, "Yeah."  The cop says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put a tail-light on that bike."  The cop then proceeds to issue the kid a $20.00 bicycle safety violation ticket.  The kid takes the ticket and before he rides off says, "By the way, that's a nice horse you got there. Did Santa bring that to you?"  Humoring the kid, the cop says, "Yeah, he sure did."  The kid says, "Well, next year tell Santa to put the stupidity in the horse's brain instead of on his back."

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Monday, December 10, 2018

ANOTHER COLD GRAY DAY

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GROANER’S CORNER:((  t was Christmas Eve in at the Supermarket meat counter and a woman was anxiously picking over the last few remaining turkeys in the hope of finding a large one.  In desperation she called over a shop assistant and said, 'Excuse me. Do these turkeys get any bigger?'  'No, madam, 'he replied, 'they're all dead.'

Q: Why was Santa's little helper depressed?

A: Because he had low elf esteem.

Q: What do you get when you cross an archer with a gift-wrapper?

A: Ribbon hood.

What's red and white and black all over?  Santa Claus after he slid down the chimney.

How do snowmen get around?   On their icicles.

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