|SO NICE TO SEE BLUE SKIES AT THIS TIME OF YEAR|
|NO, WE DIDN'T ATTEMPT TO GO DOWN THIS ROAD|
|SOME OF US TRAVEL ON THE ROAD AND SOME OF US DON'T|
|WHENEVER I SEE AN APPROACHING SNOW PLOW ON A NARROW ROAD I GENERALLY PULL OVER TO THE SIDE OR INTO A DRIVEWAY UNTIL IT'S GONE BY...SNOWPLOW DRIVER'S JOBS ARE HARD ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT MAKING IT ANY HARDER FOR THEM|
So I'm at the eye clinic on Friday and have been taken into an examining room and placed in a tilt-back chair. It's a small clinic and I could hear the eye doc talking to a lady in the next room. He said to her, "we have two options, you can go to London for surgery or we can wait 3 months and check your eye again at that time". The lady opted to wait 3 months. There was some more mumbled talk and then I heard the doctor's voice clearly say the words, "needle in the eye". Well, that of course instantly exploded my undivided attention and put my overactive imagination into overdrive because at the time I wasn't really sure why I was undergoing this second eye appointment in one week. Meanwhile, a staff member comes into the room I'm in and asks me some eye-related questions then says to tilt my head back so she could put some drops in my eyes. No problem I thought because I've had that done before and it's a standard procedure for checking eyes. So, she does that, then reaches for another bottle and turns around with the words, "now we'll put a little freezing in your eyes". With those 9 terrifying words, my mind instantly went into triple overdrive panic mode. I've been to enough dentists and through enough minor scrapes in my lifetime to know what those 9 words mean. To 'DULL THE PAIN'!! My now illogically compromised brain immediately connected the "needle in the eye" words with the "now we'll put a little freezing in your eyes," and went haywire. With fear now the dominant factor I radically contemplated a mad dash for the door and out of the building. Just about the time my muscles were geared up to launch me out of that chair the cheery doctor comes wheeling around the corner into the room, extends his elbow for an elbow bump and asks me why I wasn't in Arizona. Well, between the friendly elbow bump greeting and the mention of Arizona he completely knocked my panicky thoughts right out of kilter and before I could say boo he had my nose, chin, and eyes pressed tightly into some sort of faceplant machine. With his face up close on the opposite side of all the metal I see a bright light with his words in my ears saying, "with your left eye look at my right ear". Same words repeated for the right eye and left ear. Hey, what's eyes got to do with ears anyway. (without ears my glasses would fall off) With a few hmmmms, haws, ums, ohs, ooooos and awes, he wheeled back in his chair telling me everything looked totally good and he'll see me again in 6 months. So, can I spell RELIEF?? Oh yes I can:)) Of course I wondered to myself right away why the freezing was put into my eyes but I sure wasn't going to ask him just in case it had something to do with a needle in the eye that he had forgotten about. Needless to say, I was out of that chair and out the building making a fast bee-line like Jumpin Jack Flash for the Jeep just in case he remembered something. I later learned that the freezing on my eyeballs was there to prevent any discomfort when the doctor was looking at my eyes because he actually had something right on my eyeballs. Gosh, I didn't feel a thing. Well, fancy that eh. Yes, I can now understand why she put some freezing in my eyes. It indeed would have been uncomfortable without it. Now, I had better get to work on this 'always assuming things' mind of mine.......................
GROANER'S CORNER:(( A Veterinarian was feeling ill and went to see her doctor. The doctor asked her all the usual questions, about symptoms, how long had they been occurring, etc., when she interrupted him: "Hey look, I'm a vet - I don't need to ask my patients these kinds of questions: I can tell what's wrong just by looking at them so why can't you?" The doctor nodded, stood back, looked her up and down, quickly wrote out a prescription, handed it to her and said, "There you are. Of course, if that doesn't work, we'll have to have you put to sleep."
It seems I have spent a lifetime of repeatedly saying, “Sit up straight.....Say thank you... Use your napkin... Close your mouth when you chew and Don’t lean back in your chair.” And then just when I finally got my husband squared away, the kids came along:((!!